Wellness Wednesday: Compliments
Photo by George Dolgikh: https://www.pexels.com/photo/thank-you-signage-2072165/
Wellness Wednesday: Compliments
Which one are you:
Friend: "That hairstyle looks great on you. It frames your face perfectly."
You: "Really? I just wanted it out of my eyes."
Or:
Friend: "That hairstyle looks great on you. It frames your face perfectly."
You: "Thank you, I appreciate knowing it looks good."
Genuine compliments can help boost our self-esteem and self-worth. Studies have shown that receiving a compliment increases our levels of oxytocin – the "love" hormone.
When we give someone a genuine compliment, it can benefit the giver. The giver can feel just as happy as the receiver does.
Compliments make us feel connected to one another. When done correctly, they can also make us feel valued and appreciated. So, be sure you're honest and detailed when complimenting someone.
Some people are not affected by compliments one way or another. They may be internally secure and don't want or need external validation, while others find they like having that praise from someone else to keep them motivated and feeling safe.
Those of us who struggle with low self-worth and low self-esteem may not know how to accept a compliment. It may bring up feelings that go against how we view ourselves.
For a long time, I had my mom's negative voice in my head, telling me terrible things about myself. So, when someone told me something good about myself, I immediately dismissed it.
My self-worth and self-esteem grew as I moved along in my recovery and healing journey. I learned gratitude, and with that, I learned how to give compliments and internally receive them without feeling like I wasn't worthy of them or I wasn't humble enough.
Suppose you'd like to learn how to accept compliments internally. In that case, you can start by identifying which compliments make you uncomfortable and which ones you dismiss.
You can keep track of these compliments and then ask yourself what made you uncomfortable or dismiss them. Was it the person? If so, why? Was it the topic? What feelings did it evoke? Are you avoiding something? Journal out what comes to mind.
Sending everyone happy and healthy vibes,
Life Coach Laura
